Close

Psalm 34:18

My brain is a bit muddled and tired today!

I was going to give the blog a miss this week, but then I stopped to think about why my brain is muddled and tired. By attempting to put pen to paper (or fingertips to keys), I want to recognise that there may be others who are muddled and tired for the same reason as me!

I can’t remember exactly when it happened, but I remember standing in Mum and Dad’s house and realising that something had changed. The relationship we had before had shifted. It was now time for their three kids to reverse roles.

We were the caregivers now.

What I actually thought at the time was, “oh no, my parents are old now; when did that happen?”

I recognise that there are many who have not had the opportunity to take care of their parents into old age and acknowledge that having 80 years with Mum was a blessing. Nevertheless, the responsibility of caring for Dad in the right way weighs heavy on all three of us. Even as I write this, I’m struggling to find the right words as I don’t want to give the impression that this responsibility is a burden.

It’s not!

As you can tell by the way I’m stumbling over my words; I’ve not really processed what it is but I know that I’m not alone in this.

There are others around my age balancing caring for their own kids and trying to do their best to be there for elderly relatives. Despite so many of us going through this experience, I don’t hear it talked about very often, mainly because it’s really hard to talk about. If this blog has any purpose at all, it is to recognise that there is a sadness, and at times a feeling of helplessness, as we try and support the elderly members of our family and provide the right care for them.

Other than in the context of baked beans, you will rarely hear me use the word ‘hate,’ but I will wholeheartedly use it to describe Alzheimer’s. Trying to second-guess what a person with this condition wants and needs while navigating the complexity of the illness is hard. We’re not the only family who feels it, but I want to acknowledge those who are walking/have walked this path.

As you know, I never tie things up in a neat bow. I’ve learned from the psalms that stating how we feel is important, and I would encourage those travelling the same path as our family to do the same. Take these jumbled thoughts as a tight squeeze from someone in the same position. If we were meeting in person, you’d probably need to keep your game face on and keep going, but I recognise it’s hard sometimes.

In previous weeks I have focused on one particular psalm.

Today it’s just one verse.

Take time to rest in Psalm 34:18, drawing comfort from the many translations below.

The Lord is close to the broken-hearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.

Psalm 34:18 (NIV)

The Lord is close to the brokenhearted; he rescues those whose spirits are crushed.

Psalm 34:18 (NLT)

If your heart is broken, you’ll find God right there; if you’re kicked in the gut, he’ll help you catch your breath.

Psalm 34:18 (MSG)

When someone is hurting or brokenhearted, the Eternal moves in close and revives him in his pain.

Psalm 34:18 (The Voice)

The Lord is there to rescue all who are discouraged and have given up hope.

Psalm 34:18 (CEV)

Let’s keep praying for each other as God guides us to provide the best care we can for those we love.

Know that God is close to all of us, in this and through this.

Kay Moorby